Until I'm Gone
by owleyes333
Summary: Castiel is stuck in Jimmy while Jimmy reverts back to being a child. Ratings are varied, but overall around T. This is a Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Drama with a touch of Romance and Humor.
1. Chapter One: Until I'm Gone

_A brief "hello" to whoever is reading this! This is my fifth challenge word, "knees." I thought that since I just finished a particularly humorous and "dirty" story, I would go on to write something dramatic, sad, and a bit fluffy. So here it is. This story, "Until I'm Gone" is the first chapter of a much longer story, which will be written as the challenge words continue (and where you can find the original challenge word four, "babysit"!). I hope you like it, and please know that this story was inspired by a story titled "Second Childhood," which is one of my favorite fanfics. Look it up when you have the time. It's a great story. As for now, I'm done speaking so I will leave you to your reading. Enjoy._

_SPN Write-Off Day 4  
Challenge Word: "Knees"  
Character(s): Dean/Castiel, Sam  
Chapter Rating: K (For Now)  
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort.  
Setting: Sometime in Season 5._

**Until I'm Gone**

This was not a dream Dean had often, nor was it a dream that held any particular impact. It was just a simple dream, and a long forgotten memory.

_Here in this dream, John sat on his favorite living room chair. He was watching some late-night rerun, and he was wearing his pajama bottoms and his Marine Corps t-shirt. Dean knew, even as he was dreaming, that that was not really the shirt his father wore that day. It was just the shirt Dean remembered most - and he did not want to remember why. _

"_Daddy?" Dean, still only four years old, had walked into the room wearing one of John's oversized t-shirts, the ends (slightly tattered from use) had reached down to the boy's knees._

"_Dean?" His father had asked, turning around in his seat. "What are you doing up this late? Its past your bedtime."_

"_I had a nightmare," Dean said, walking over to his father's side. Dean tugged at the bottom of his shirt, then, and looked up at his father, expectant. _

_John smiled lazily. "A nightmare, huh?" He asked, bending forward to scoop his hands under his child's arms. He lifted him up onto his lap, and Dean moved to rest his head against his father's chest. He could hear the man's gentle heartbeat, and that alone calmed him. "Sit with me for a while. You'll forget it, soon enough..."_

_But the nightmares would just continue, _Dean thought the moment he woke up to find himself in yet another motel bed, in yet another forgettable city. He lay there a while, in the dark, the lights from the city outside shinning in from the small gape between the curtains. Mismatched shadows glided almost rhythmically against the ceiling, accompanied by the sounds of rushing cars and people from the busy streets outside.

With a soft sigh, Dean turned to look at the clock beside his bed, only to find giant red numbers glaring back at him. 2:31, it read. _And the city is still alive... _

For a brief moment, Dean considered slipping out of bed, grabbing his jacket, heading outside and getting in the impala. He thought of driving in the city, at night, the cool breeze across his face... Of getting a beer at a local bar.

All his thoughts of leaving stopped when he heard the bed springs across the room creak once, gently, as Sam shifted his weight. _Sam..._ if only he had had the normal life he wanted. The life they both wanted, so long ago... They could have had their own families, their own homes, their own normal jobs... They could have been...ordinary.

Dean turned back around to lie on his back and face the ceiling. There was no reason for that kind of thought now. It could never happen, not after all they've been through. And did he even want that anymore?

He watched lazily as the shadows passed, looking for something in each figure, but not knowing exactly what it was... _What I'd give for a clean start._

"Dean."

Dean closed his eyes at the sound of that deep voice, and he thought again of what his father's heart beat felt like, all those years ago. "Hey, Cas."

"Were you...resting?"

Dean opened his eyes and sat up in bed, leaning his back against the headrest. He turned once to look over at Sam, but he lay undisturbed. "No," Dean said, turning to face Castiel. "I was awake."

The angel shifted slightly as he stood, looking slightly uncomfortable. "I can return at another-"

"Cas, really, its fine." Dean yawned softly. "What is it?"

Castiel took a step forward and sat on the edge of Dean's bed, his eyes cast down to some loose thread on the bedspread. He rolled the piece of thread between his forefinger and thumb while he spoke. "There was an...accident."

"An accident?" Dean echoed, leaning closer to the angel. "What kind of accident?"

"I... I seem to have fallen victim to a curse, Dean." The angel said softly, turning to face Dean. His bright blue eyes stared endlessly. "One I cannot undo."

"Is there something I can do?" Dean asked, hopefully.

The angel just smiled a soft, sad smile. "Not at this time."

"There has got to be something..."

"One of my brothers has offered his assistance."

"Which?"

"Gabriel."

Dean was silent for a moment. He could not be sure how much help the trickster could be, but out of all of the angels Dean supposed Gabriel wasn't that bad of a choice. "What's the curse?"

"It is a binding curse," the angel said as he turned to look up at Dean. "It traps me inside this vessel, indefinitely."

"That can't be too bad..."

"There is a second curse, as well, Dean. An aging curse."

"So...you're going to grow old?"

"No, younger. It's a reversal."

"Like Benjamin Button?" Dean's sleepiness had all but left him now, as he stared wide eyed.

Castiel looked at him, uncomprehending.

"You're trapped in Jimmy," Dean explained, relaying the information. "...and Jimmy just keeps getting younger and younger until... until what, exactly?"

Castiel looked down at the piece of thread, and plucked it from the sheet. "Until I'm gone."

"Gone?" The word seemed heavy and final in this dark, quiet room. At the mere mention of the word, something inside Dean tightened. "How...What... What do you mean, gone? Like Houdini gone, or - or-"

Dean realized his voice had raised in his panic, and he was no longer whispering, but almost yelling. From the corner of his eye, he saw Sam turn in bed to face them. "Dean? Cas? What are you-"

"Tell him, Dean," Castiel said, coming to a stand.

Dean noticed the look in Castiel's eyes, and change in the curve of his shoulders. "Don't you dare leave me now, Cas-"

But it was too late. Castiel was already gone. Dean, defeated, slid back down and raised the blankets over his head. He then placed another pillow over his ear, blocking out Sam's voice. As Dean's nightmares continued, the only heartbeat he could count on was the one he heard now, rising from his chest to the pit of his throat... _But really, _he wondered, _how long will I even have that?_

_...to be continued._


	2. Chapter Two: The Scrawny Angel

_A brief "hello" to whoever is reading this! This is my sixth challenge word, "dog." This story is the __**second chapter**__ in an __**ongoing **__**story**__. The first chapter is called "Until I'm Gone." I hope you like it, and please know that this story was inspired by a story titled "Second Childhood," which is one of my favorite fanfics. Look it up when you have the time. It's a great story. As for now, I'm done speaking so I will leave you to your reading. Enjoy._

_SPN Write-Off Day 5  
Challenge Category: "Animal"  
Challenge Word: "Dog"  
Character(s): Dean/Castiel, Sam, Gabe  
Chapter Rating: T (For Now - Suggestive)  
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort.  
Setting: Sometime in Season 5._

**The Scrawny Angel**

Dean woke to the sound of the radio. He recognized the song instantly, but as he lifted his head to begin to sing the first few lines of Zeppelin's"Ramble On," he paused and took a moment to look around the room. Other than himself, and Sam in the shower, the room was empty. And it was then that Dean remembered.

"_So, you're going to grow old?" _

The sound of Dean's question echoed softly in his head. He turned to look back at the spot where Castiel had sat, fiddling with the piece of loose thread from the bed sheet.

"_Until I'm gone."_

Dean threw back the bed sheets and sat up. He could hear Sam turn off the shower and toss back the shower curtain. He looked up then, and could see Sam looking at him through the mirror, a towel wrapped around his waist. Sam's shoulders tensed, and he turned to run his fingers through his hair.

"So what happened last night?" Sam asked, his back now toward his brother. He looked at himself in his own mirror, and picked an eyelash out of the corner of his eye.

Dean swallowed in an attempt to get rid of that awful lump in his throat, but it didn't seem to do him any good. "We've got a situation," he said, his voice a bit gruff. "Castiel...he's-"

"Getting younger by the minute!" A third voice piped in with a grin. "Looking good, Sam."

Sam cursed slightly as his finger slipped and he poked his eye.

"Need some help there, buddy?" Gabriel offered with a laugh.

Sam scrunched up his face and rubbed at his eye. "No."

"Your loss," Gabriel said with a shrug. He turned to Dean, then, and his eyes softened - slightly. "Dean, what's wrong? You look like a kicked puppy."

Dean turned to Gabriel, his jaw tight. "Aren't you supposed to be off on your broom, cooking up something to give to your brother?"

"I'm allowed a break, aren't I? We're in America, right? What is it - ten minute break every few hours? I figured, I -"

"Not when -" Dean started, coming to a stand.

Sam, however, managed to cut them both off as he now found himself in clothes and standing just a few feet away from the two of them. "Again, what's this 'situation' both of you keep talking about? Something about Castiel?"

"I already told you," Gabe said. "He's getting younger by the minute! Poor guy was zapped, you know, POW! By something particularly nasty. He's stuck in Jimmy now, and not in the good way." Gabe turned to look once more at Dean. "And you all have the joy of babysitting him."

"You've got to be kidding me," Sam said, mouth wide.

"Normally, yes. This time, though, I'm serious." Gabe quickly tapped Sam's chest with a pink toy rattle, which Sam snatched away from him. Gabe smiled. "Now be good. Daddy's got some work to do!"

And just like that, he left.

"Shouldn't we be doing more important things than babysitting an angel?" Sam asked, looking down at the rattle quizzically. He tossed it onto the bed and looked down at his brother. "I mean, come on, with Lucifer on our trail..."

"I do apologize for the inconvenience, Sam, but I...I have nowhere else to go."

Sam's back straightened at the sound of Castiel's deep voice behind him, and he turned to look at the -

_The_ _scrawny angel?_

"Woah." Dean said, staring at the teenage version of Jimmy. He was dressed in the same clothes as before, only this time they were much too heavy for his small frame to hold. They just engulfed him. Castiel's hair, too, was longer and a bit shaggy, almost like Sam's. If it wasn't for the trench coat and those intense blue eyes, Dean could have sworn he was another person.

"You..." Sam said, looking the boy up and down.

"Dude, you look like a chick!" Dean said as he burst up laughing, the sound strangely welcomed.

"I am simply as my vessel was at the age... nineteen." Castiel said, readjusting his trench coat, his cheeks a little pink.

"So Jimmy was a girl at nineteen..."

"That is not funny, Dean."

"Tell me about it," Dean said, suddenly serious as he brushed past the two of them and headed into the bathroom. "I'm taking a shower."

"Better make that a cold one!" He heard Sam snicker.

"Bite me!"


	3. Chapter Three: Uncle Sam

_A brief "hello" to whoever is reading this! This is my seventh challenge word, "uncle." This story is the __**third chapter**__ in an __**ongoing**__**story**__. By now you should have read "Until I'm Gone" and "The Scrawny Angel." This one's a bit funny, and but don't fret - the sadness will come back...just not in this episode. I hope you like it, and please know that this story was inspired by a story titled "Second Childhood," which is one of my favorite fanfics. Look it up when you have the time. It's a great story. As for now, I'm done speaking so I will leave you to your reading. Enjoy._

_SPN Write-Off Day 6  
Challenge Category: "Family"  
Challenge Word: "Uncle"  
Character(s): Dean/Castiel, Sam  
Chapter Rating: T (For Now - Suggestive)  
Genre: Humor  
Setting: Sometime in Season 5._

**Uncle Sam**

This is why Dean had never cared for a girlfriend. Walking through aisle after aisle, staring at the shirts and shoes and socks and - _Is there even an exit outta this place? _Dean thought in a craze, turning to look around the clothing store.

"Is something the matter, Dean?" The scrawny angel turned to face the (now older) hunter, seriously. His thin face and long hair still seemed so odd to Dean, who was uncomfortably attracted to the once-winged girl - _uh, man. Once-winged_ _man._

"No..." Dean said. "This is just...odd."

"Oh."

"What do you think of this?" Sam said, looking over one of the smaller aisles at the other two. He lifted up a tight, black strapless dress with a grin. "Your kinda style?"

Dean looked up at the dress and stared, his jaw set.

"I do not believe that is the appropriate attire..." Castiel said, almost as a question. He looked down at himself and his heavy trench coat which in turn sagged off his shoulders.

"No," Dean said, shooting Sam an 'I'm going to kill you when we get home' look. He turned his back toward his brother, who just laughed and went to put the dress away. Dean looked down at Castiel then, and moved to straighten the scrawny angel's coat. For a moment, Dean just looked at him, taking in this teenage Jimmy before him. It felt so bizarre, looking at this small frame and thinking it held something so...amazing. _Amazing?_ Dean cleared his throat, and dusted off Castiel's coat and tie. "Let's just get you...some more of these."

"These?"

"You know, coats and ties and things." Dean motioned toward Castiel. "You know, these."

Castiel looked down with a smile as he rubbed his tie between his fingers, flipping it back and forth. "I like these."

"Good, then we'll get you some of those." Dean said as he turned quickly and started for the other end of the store. He couldn't wait until he was away from the bright lights and crowds of people and clothes and...strange smells. _We'll just make this fast, _Dean thought, looking over at the ties. _Grab a couple ties, a new coat, some pants... who knows how long he'll even stay _this _age..._ And suddenly, Dean felt tense. How long _would_ Cas stay like this? Would Gabriel really find a solution in time? Was there even a solution? Or would Cas have to -

"Dean!"

Dean turned around to the sound of Castiel's voice, only to find that there was no obvious sign of imminent danger. Instead the angel just stood there, holding his tie and looking up at Dean with surprisingly young eyes...or maybe they just seemed younger. Dean could not tell. "What is it, Cas?"

"I like this color."

"Blue?"

"Yes, blue..." Castiel said with a soft smile. "I like this. It reminds me of the sky."

"And your eyes,"Dean mumbled, mainly to himself, as he took a moment to really take in what Castiel had said. It sounded so... young. And the look on his face was so innocent, so simple. It was an expression that Dean was not used to seeing on Castiel's tired face. _It's kind of nice,_ Dean thought, that same soft smile on his face. He reached over to the table of ties to his left, and he picked up a vibrant red tie. "Why not spice it up a bit?"

"That is even more inappropriate than Sam's suggestion," Castiel said, his face suddenly stern. His eyes narrowed as he moved over to the table on the far right, and picked up a tie which matched his current one exactly. After taking a couple minutes to properly scrutinize it, he lifted it up and turned to Dean. "This one."

"Don't you think you-" Dean started, but stopped the second his eyes caught Castiel's face again. Jimmy's body had started to get a bit younger, and his body a bit thinner. Although it was as gradual a change from nineteen to about a seventeen or sixteen, Dean could tell and feared the rest of the shoppers or store employees might notice that Castiel was changing. How long would he even stay that age? Having Castiel revert back to a ten year old boy in the middle of a public place may not be a good idea. _We should have never come here..._

"Hello, and welcome!"

Both of the boys turned in time to see a young, short girl with a bob of blonde hair and several different colored ties slung over her neck. She looked between the both of them with a sweet smile. "Can I help you choose a tie for your son? We've got a lovely selection of-"

"No, no, no," Dean said quickly, his hands up almost defensively. "This - he - he's not my son."

"Oh..." the girl looked confused for a moment, but then perked up a second later with a cheery, "I'm terribly sorry, it is just, with the age difference and all, I assumed...well. That's not important. I would just like to inform you, that we are welcoming of any race, religion, color, or sexual orientation here."

"Why does this always happen to me..." Dean mumbled, sighing heavily. "We're not together."

"Oh..." the girl said again, confused and embarrassed as she looked between the two. She just smiled softly this time. Waiting for the appropriate answer.

"We are his uncles," Sam said with a smile as he suddenly appeared between Dean and Castiel. Dean tensed slightly as he felt Sam squeeze his left shoulder. He stared at Sam's hand almost as if it was the plague.

The salesgirl just heaved a heavy sigh and rolled her eyes, her calm demeanor suddenly lifted. "Look - you need help or what?"

Castiel held up the blue tie he had lifted off the table. "Does this tie seem...suitable?"

"We'll be fine," Dean said shrugging Sam's hand off of him before placing his hands on Castiel's shoulders and steering him away from the ties and toward the jackets. "Thanks, but no thanks."

"She had not yet replied," Castiel protested, but Dean just continued to lead him into the other direction, fully aware of the salesgirl's eyes following them...and Sam's snickering from just behind him. "Shut it, Sam. Cas is changing, and we need to just get this crap and leave."

Sam held up a handful of bags and shook them slightly. "What do you think these are?"

"Condoms."

Sam rolled his eyes.

"Right," Dean corrected, "What was I thinking? You have no use for those."

"And you do?" Sam asked, eyebrows raised.

Dean narrowed his eyes at Sam. "Cas, hurry it up..." When he heard no response, Dean turned to the aisles of clothes, but saw no one. "Cas?"

The rack of clothes next to him swayed slightly, and a moment later a gangly twelve year old boy emerged with oversized clothing. Dean sighed heavily the second he saw him. "Not again..."

Castiel just smiled sadly as his trench coat hit the ground. "Hello, Dean." Castiel's shirt fell off his shoulder slightly, exposing skin. "Sam."

"Why now?" Dean whined and headed toward the exit. "How are we supposed to walk out of here with this kid? He looks like a street urchin... or someone from that bad 90's kid rap band or whatever..."

Sam took a step forward and bent down to see Castiel's face better. "I'd say more Hanson than anything."

"Why are you so gay?"

"I'm hungry," Sam said, suddenly serious. He motioned to the cash register. "Take what Castiel has got in his hands, and pay for it over there while I take him to the restroom to put on some of these new dresses - uh, clothes. These new clothes."

"Right..." Dean said, moving to grab the ties out of Castiel's hands, his eyes still on his brother. For some reason, he felt like leaving Cas with his brother was almost cruel...to Cas, that is. "But what if he doesn't like what you got him?"

"Too bad," Sam shrugged, moving Castiel along to the bathroom with a hand on the small angel's back. "Its better than these."

"But you'll save them, right? His clothes now, I mean. For when he becomes human again?"

"Duh. I'll just put them back in this bag."

"Make sure no one sees you."

Sam rolled his eyes and turned away from Dean, his hand on Castiel's back as he guided him through the aisles, steering him toward the men's bathrooms.

"Did you get me a tie?" Castiel asked, trying to peer into one of Sam's bags, his small fingers trying to pry open the plastic.

"No."

"Oh," Castiel said softly as he turned to look down on the ground.

"I bought you three."

Castiel turned back to Sam and craned his neck to look up into the tall hunter's face, Castiel's own eyes shining with childish splendor. "Really?"

Sam smiled and ruffled the small angel's hair. "Who knew you were so easy to please."


	4. Chapter Four: Wish You Were Here

_A brief "hello" to whoever is reading this! This is my eighth challenge word, which is more like a song now. In this case, its "Pink Floyd." This story is the __**fourth chapter**__ in an __**ongoing**__**story**__. By now you should have read "Until I'm Gone," "The Scrawny Angel," and "Uncle Sam." Funny time's over, and now were back to sad times. I hope you like it, and please know that this story was inspired by a story titled "Second Childhood," which is one of my favorite fanfics. Look it up when you have the time. It's a great story. As for now, I'm done speaking so I will leave you to your reading. Enjoy._

_SPN Write-Off Day 8  
Challenge Category: "Music"  
Challenge Song: "Pink Floyd's 'Wish You Were Here'"  
Character(s): Dean/Castiel, Sam  
Chapter Rating: K (For Now)  
Genre: Drama  
Setting: Sometime in Season 5._

**Wish You Were Here**

Sam yawned gently, nodding off to the sound of the impala's purr. He stretched his long legs as much as he could manage, and turned to face the window. "Yes," he slurred, sleepy. "Its weird, I know."

"Its just not right," Dean continued, oblivious to the nearly-napping moose beside him. Dean looked in his rearview mirror, and adjusted it so that he could see into the backseat better. There, Jimmy Novak's thin twelve year old frame slept clutching Dean's jacket. "Something's wrong, Sammy. He's just...he's just not the same."

"That's a cause he's a girl..." Sam slurred again, his eyelids growing heavy.

"Twilight Zone, I'm telling you," Dean continued, his eyes now focused on the road. "Cas shows up with a warning, then zap. Gone. Comes back a few hours later and he's already nineteen? A few hours after that and what, twelve?"

Dean looked up into the rearview mirror again, only to see that Castiel was still sleeping soundly. For a moment, seeing Jimmy's young body there, sleeping in the back seat like that brought him back to their younger years, when their father would move them from town to town. Often on trips to and from a job, Sammy would fall asleep in the back seat of the impala, lulled into a dream from the purr of the engine. If there was ever a time Sam fell asleep when their father's jacket was in the backseat, the jacket would always find its way back into Sammy's hands, even if unintentional. It was then that Sam looked most at peace.

_It was easier back then_, Dean thought, turning again to look at the road. He took a left at a crossroads and continued east. He pinched the bridge of his nose, and rubbed at the area beneath his eyes. He needed to stay awake, stay focused. _Focus, damn you. _"So what are we gonna do about the Backstreet Boy in the back seat?"

When there was no response, Dean turned to face his brother, only to find the massive lump asleep in the passenger seat. Dean smiled. _Like old times._ He reached forward and got his tape from off of the dashboard, and did not bother to look at it before he placed it in the tape player.

_So, so you think you can tell..._

As Pink Floyd's "Wish You Were Here" began to play, Dean's thoughts wandered back to Castiel and their current situation. Just how long before Castiel's next change took place? Why did they vary in speed? Is there a way to slow it down?

_Heaven from Hell, _

_Blue skies from pain..._

How was Dean going to explain this to Bobby? He had meant to call the man before the three of them took off on a road trip to his house, but Dean couldn't seem to find the right words - again. Were there even words?

_Can you tell a green field_

_From a cold steel rail?_

_A smile from a veil?_

_Do you think you can tell?_

Dean lowered the music, brought out his phone, and got ready to call Bobby...but then he just hung up, deciding that it was probably better just to show the guy in person what they were dealing with, and see how to reverse it...or at least, slow it down. Hopefully Bobby would know what to do. He always does.

_And did they get you to trade..._

_Your heroes for ghosts?_

_Hot ashes for trees?_

_Hot air for a cool breeze?_

_Cold comfort for change? _

Dean chanced another look into the backseat and noticed his jacket had fallen from Castiel's grasp. Keeping a firm hand on the wheel, Dean leaned back and grabbed his jacket off the impala's floor, placing it gently back on Castiel's shoulders. The twelve year old boy's fingers wrapped themselves around the edge of the collar.

_And did you exchange_

_A walk on part in the war..._

Dean sighed as he remembered last night in the motel room, Castiel's fingers fidgeting with some thread from the bed sheet as he told Dean about what had happened. He wished he had told him more. He had tried to get more information out of Castiel now, but he would just change the subject in some way, or something would come up. Dean could not tell if Castiel was avoiding the subject for a reason, or if he really did not know.

_For a lead role in a cage?_

He just wanted him back. This boy in the backseat... it was not Cas. Not really. Sure, the body was the same. Sure, he knew Cas was in there somewhere... but it was just... not real. This whole thing just didn't seem real...

_But that's okay,_ Dean reassured himself. _Bobby will know what to do._

The sky brightened gently, fading into dawn.

_How I wish, how I wish you were here..._

Dean looked into the back seat again, just as Castiel began to rub at his eyes.

_We're just two lost souls_

_Swimming in a fish bowl_

_Year after year..._

He lowered the volume again, just as Castiel turned to look at him. _His face had grown younger in his sleep_, Dean thought as Castiel yawned, wrapping Dean's jacket tighter around his body. Dean smiled softly, and prayed Castiel could not sense his fear.

"Good morning, Sleeping Beauty."

The boy in the backseat grumbled and turned away, his back toward Dean.

_Cas, how I wish you were here._


	5. Chapter Five: Mmm, Bop

_A brief "hello" to whoever is reading this! This story is the __**fifth chapter**__ in an __**ongoing**__**story**__. By now you should have read "Until I'm Gone," "The Scrawny Angel," "Uncle Sam," and "Wish You Were Here." I hope you like it, and please know that this story was inspired by a story titled "Second Childhood," which is one of my favorite fanfics. Look it up when you have the time. It's a great story. As for now, I'm done speaking so I will leave you to your reading. Enjoy._

_Character(s): Dean/Castiel, Sam, Bobby, Gabriel  
Chapter Rating: T (Language)  
Genre: Drama, Humor  
Setting: Sometime in Season 5._

**Mmm, Bop**

Bobby was in the middle of washing the dishes when he heard that familiar engine. _Dean?_ He turned to look out the window, and sure enough he saw the impala heading his way. _But why? To visit?_ Bobby knew it was foolish to wish the boys would come over once in a while, just to pop in and say 'hey.' With an apocalypse underway, it was understandable. But once all of it was over, they sure as hell better visit.

Bobby grabbed a towel to dry his hands, but paused as he heard... "Hanson? This has got to be a joke."

"Fuck you, Sammy!" Dean shouted, turning off the engine and slamming the car door.

"What?" Sam asked with a smile, trying to repress his laughter.

It was then that Castiel crawled out of the back seat and out of the impala, singing, "_Mmm bop, da ba doo bop, dooby dop-_"

"It really is the apocalypse!" Bobby shouted at the lot as he walked toward the car. He took a look at the both of them before turning to look down at the twelve year old, blue eyed boy who was wiggling about in a small beige trench coat and converse. "What are you boys doin' here? And whose the tike?"

Dean walked up to Bobby and placed his hand on his shoulder. "Bobby, tell me you've got beer."

"A whole new case in the fridge."

"Good." Dean said, jogging up the front steps and opening the front door.

"Well 'hello' to you too!" Bobby shot back, but Dean had already gone inside. Bobby turned again to face Sam. "So ya gonna tell me what's goin' on or what?"

"You mean Dean didn't tell you?" Sam asked incredulously, but Bobby wasn't hearing any of it.

"You boys better tell me what's goin' on or-"

"Alright, _alright._" Castiel, who was now attached to Sam's leg, stared blankly at Bobby. "Bobby..." Sam started, and took a deep breath. "Meet Castiel..."

"_Castiel?_"

Castiel smiled widely. "Hi."

Bobby stared at the child for a brief moment before turning back around without a word, and heading back into the house.

"Bobby!" Sam called after him, "Where you going?"

"To get a beer - what else!"

A short time later, the three men were gathered in the kitchen while Jimmy Novak's body ran throughout the house, playing cowboys and Indians... with himself.

"...So you mean to tell me that this..._this psycho_ kid...is Castiel? The freakin' angel of the lord?"

"Pretty much." Sam said with a smile, rubbing the back of his neck as he leaned farther into his chair, stretching his long legs. "Told you it was pretty unbelievable."

"Unbelievable doesn't even begin to cut it," Bobby said, narrowing his eyes as he heard a crash come from the other room. "You sure as hell better not have broken anything!"

"Nope!" was the simple reply, before more running ensued.

"So you think you can fix him?" Dean asked, tossing his beer into the trash.

"Maybe if you learn to recycle."

"What?"

Bobby nodded toward the trashcans. "Wrong trash can, kid."

"Since when did you get all Ed Begley Jr.?" Dean asked, fishing out the can.

Bobby shrugged, "Picked it up from Rufus."

"Rufus? Really?" Dean asked, surprised. "Didn't take him for the 'go green' type."

"You'd be surprised what people care about during the apocalypse," said a fourth voice from the other side of the room. "Hey, guys. How's it goin'?"

"'How's it goin'?'" Dean asked, furiously. He took a step toward Gabriel, the can in his hand now crushed. "You leave us with this kid, come back, and that's all you have to say? 'How's it goin'?"

"Woah, woah," Gabriel said, putting his hands up in defense. "Calm down there, Mike Tyson. I'd like to keep my ears, thanks." Gabriel straightened up before turning to walk around the room slowly, lollipop sticking out from the corner of his mouth. The three men stared at him incredulously.

"Well?" Dean shouted, still aggravated.

"Well, I found out what's happening." Gabriel said, picking up an old leather-bound book off of one of the chairs.

"And?"

"And its not good." Gabriel turned the book over in his hands, opened it and started skimming its pages. "Seems as if we've got something more than just a curse. The little one's been hit with something much more powerful, by someone much more powerful."

"Thanks, Sherlock." Dean said sarcastically. "Now how can we kill it and get Cas back?"

"Cas-"

"Brother!" Castiel came running up to Gabriel, and lunged at him. Surprised, Gabriel caught him at the last minute, hoisting him up. "Well, just look at you!"

Dean watched as Castiel's arms wrapped around Gabriel's neck, and swore he saw a sense of nostalgia pass along Gabriel's face before the angel laughed and put Castiel back down on his feet.

"Getting younger by the minute, eh?" Gabriel said with a smile, ruffling the young boy's hair.

"I missed you," Castiel said sadly, "Why did you leave?"

Gabriel looked at the three other men before getting down on his knee to look into the boy's blue eyes. "I went to get you..." He pulled out a remote control car from behind his back, made to look just like Dean's impala. "This."

"Woah!" Castiel shouted, his mouth an 'o.' He turned back around to face Dean, his eyes shinning. "Dean, look!" Castiel held the car up to Dean, "It looks just like yours! Cool, huh?"

"Very." Dean said, catching Gabriel's eye.

"Why don't you take it outside?" Gabriel said, coming to a stand. He pushed lightly on the boy's back, leading him toward the door. "Go run it off the roof of Dean's car."

"Don't you dare-" Dean started, but stopped as Castiel wrapped his arms around his older brother's knees.

"Thank you!" Castiel said before rushing off outside, toy car and remote in hand. Gabriel watched him leave, then turned back to Dean with his lollipop in his mouth. "Its Heaven."

"What's Heaven?" Sam asked.

"Someone up there has got a hard on for Cas," Gabriel replied, taking his lollipop out of his mouth to point it in Sam's direction. "I told him to watch out, but you know little brothers... they don't always listen."

"Well that's all good and dandy," Bobby piped in, now from the other room. The three others turned toward him as he placed a bottle of scotch and an old book down on his desk. "What are we going to do about this kid? I'm gettin' old and I'm not about to start raising another boy. These two-" he motioned to Sam and Dean, "were it for me. And look how they came out."

Dean looked over at Sam, shrugged, and nodded. "Point taken."

"Hey!" Sam protested, but as he was about to come up with a better retort, Gabriel spoke.

"Heaven's sent an angel, I don't know who, to come after Cas. To teach him _another_ lesson. The more Cas helps you...the more trouble he gets in." The lights in the room flickered lightly.

Sam came to a stand, and placed his hand on Gabriel's shoulder, who turned to look at it strangely. "We're here to help," Sam said quietly, "So what do you want us to do?"

"Not you," Gabriel said, "Me. I've got to go, clean up this mess. Just watch him."

Sam took his hand away from the spot the angel had just been in.

"Great explaination," Dean said sarcastically before falling into one of the chairs.

"We'll do some research," Bobby said, gathering some more books onto his desk. "Figure out what kinda angel we're dealing with."

"I'll take a trip to the library," Sam said, "and probably take Cas with me."

"I'll get some rooms ready, and then get some more books together," Bobby said, heading down the hall. "The keys for the Chevy are by the door, Sam."

"Alright."

Sam and Bobby left the room, leaving Dean by himself. "And I'll..." he started, speaking to the empty room. "Get another beer."

Dean walked over to the kitchen, making a bee line for the refrigerator. When he got there, he saw Gabriel standing, looking out the window at Castiel. Castiel had crawled on top of Dean's impala and placed the toy impala on top of the hood, and was about to drive it off when Sam came by and scooped him up and onto his shoulders. Gabriel smiled as Castiel laughed, covering Sam's eyes with his small hands.

"Thought you left," Dean said, opening the fridge, keeping his anger at bay.

"Dean..." Gabe turned to face the hunter, his smile gone. "While I'm gone, watch out for him."

"What do you think I'm doing?" Dean said, glancing outside as he grabbed another beer.

Gabriel took a step forward. "I mean Cas, not Jimmy. Talk to him, Dean. He's sad, and he's letting Jimmy do the talking for him." Gabriel motioned toward the window. "That boy out there? That's Jimmy. He's taking over his body because he knows what its like to be a kid. He remembers. Cas is afraid, so he's letting Jimmy remember...He's letting Jimmy take over because he's giving up."

"What am I supposed to do? I can't reverse the spell. I can't slow him down..."

"Be there for him," Gabe said. "He wants you to comfort him, Dean. He's just too shy to ask."

And just like that, he was gone.

Dean turned to look out the window, only to see Castiel sitting on top of Sam's shoulders, with both of their faces pressed against the glass. _Yeah...that's Jimmy._

"Boy! What the hell ya think ya doin'?" Bobby shouted, coming into the kitchen. "Get your damn faces off that glass!"

Castiel smiled and licked the glass before Sam ran away with a giggling Castiel. _Giggling? _Dean thought, _Yeah, definitely Jimmy._


	6. Chapter Six: A Lesson in Flying

_A brief "hello" to whoever is reading this! These are my ninth and tenth challenge words. This story is the __**sixth chapter**__ in an __**ongoing**__**story**__. By now you know what you should have read. I hope you like it, and please know that this story was inspired by a story titled "Second Childhood," which is one of my favorite fanfics. Look it up when you have the time. It's a great story. As for now, I'm TERRIBLY sorry for taking so long to post this. Also, I'm done speaking so I will leave you to your reading. Enjoy._

_SPN Write-Off Day 9 & 10  
Challenge Category: "Games"& "Phrases"  
Challenge Game: Truth or Dare & the flying phrase  
Character(s): Castiel, Gabriel, Balthazar, Gazardiel  
Chapter Rating: T (Language)  
Genre: Family, Drama  
Setting: Sometime in Season 5._

_***NOTE: This chapter focuses on Gabriel, with some Castiel flashbacks. This chapter spans over a few days, and if you are wondering what's happening at that time in Cas/Dean world, you can find out in Tankspridd's story "Falling With Style"! Its SUPER cute! Love you, Tankspridd! And thank you!***_

**A Lesson in Flying**

_Heaven, _

_Must be missin' an angel_

_Missin' one angel, child, 'cause you're here with me right now!_

Gabriel groaned and snapped his fingers, silencing the music. Although having Tavares' 1976 hit as an alarm signaling another angel in his near proximity seemed amusing to him in the 70's, those lyrics just were not something he wanted to hear right now.

"So..." he breathed, sitting in a worn out chair in a small apartment, watching a weight loss infomercial on television. With his eyes fixated on the screen, one of his fingers felt around the box of chocolates in his lap until he found one and popped it in his mouth. "Seems as if someone sprung the trap!"

Gabriel stood up suddenly, a bounce of adrenaline finding its way into his otherwise exhausted veins. After days and days of searching and asking around - still making sure to disguise his true self best he could - he had had enough. Anger had settled in the night before, and although he had no physical scars, he could still feel it.

"_Bastard!" Gabe had shouted as he turned the corner and stormed down an alleyway, leaving the five star hotel and the five star undercover asshole angel Charoum - known to hotel employees as 'Chatty Charlie'. _

"_Angel of Silence, my ass!" Gabriel fumed as he paced back and forth in the putrid alley. "If only any_ _of the information was helpful!" _

_Gabriel could have gone anywhere at this time, but he just didn't know where else to go. He had looked _everywhere!_ What was left? Hell?_

"_Why the hell would I care about someone making hash in the basement, anyway?" He huffed, pacing more quickly. "I just want my damn brother back!"_

_Gabriel, infuriated, had turned to the brick wall nearest him and punched it. The wall shook, and as the pulverized bricks dusted the floor, the wall began to collapse. _

Gabriel looked down at his fist and held it in his other hand. He was an angel, and so the body healed quickly. There may not be a scar - or even the slightest mark there - but he knew what it felt like. And as bad as it may have felt, he knew there was worse.

"_Gabriel?" A young, sheepish Castiel had approached the elder brother cautiously. Gabriel still remembered how the young angel used to play with his hands when he was nervous, a habit which now would never show in Jimmy's form. _

"_Yes, Castiel?" _

"_Do you think..." Castiel paused, looking away. "Do you think I'm weird?"_

"_Weird? Why would you think that?"_

"_All the other angels...they say - they say I'm different. They say I'm weird."_

"_They think _you _are weird?" Gabriel asked incredulously. "Have they not met Lucifer?"_

_The young angel smiled softly, "Brother Lucifer is a bit different..."_

"_Being different is good," Gabriel said, reaching out to hold Castiel's fidgeting hands. "You just have to keep being good. You are all still so young. Things will change when you are older."_

"_You think so?"_

"_I know so."_

"_And if they don't?"_

"_You should not have doubt, Castiel."_

"_But..."_

"_I will always be here when you need me."_

Gabriel shook his head and snapped his fingers. The infomercial then dissolved to show the door outside his small apartment. Gabriel knew coming back here, to his little domain in the sky, was risky. The angels could feel him - the ones that remembered what he felt like - and search for him. Heaven was not a safe place for him, but as he realized the night before, he had nowhere else to look. And, after all, he knew all roads led back to here. To Heaven. To home.

"You..." Gabriel's eyebrows furrowed as he stared at the screen. He snapped then, and the door flung open. A small-framed teenage boy with short-cropped dark hair and blue eyes walked into the room, his eyes searching frantically. "What are you doing here? And why do you look like Allan Hyde?"

"Should there be a more suitable place or person?"

"Please don't tell me you're still speaking in questions," Gabe grumbled.

"Where is my brother?" The teenage boy asked, starring.

Gabe found his wide blue eyed stare comforting. "The Winchesters are watching over him."

"Where is _Balthazar_?" The angel corrected.

"_Balthazar?"_

"Has he not yet shown?"

"I'm getting really tired of the truth or dare, here, Gaz."

"Is it not called 20 questions?"

"Oh? So you joke now?" Gabriel spat sarcastically. "Some of Uriel rubbed off on you, I see."

"He is the funniest-"

"Enough!" Gabriel shouted, his eyes narrowing. "What is happening to Castiel?"

"Do you _not_ know what an age reversal does?"

"But _who_, damn it, _who_ did this? And how can I reverse it? How can I save him?"

The teenage boy smiled, and pointed behind the trickster, where a third voice sounded. "Brother!"

Gabriel rolled his eyes. He really hated visiting back home. "Stop!" He shouted, turning to face Balthazar. "_I_ am the trickster here, not you! _I _am the one with the surprises and the amusement! You_ - you - _are the one that is going to tell me what the _hell_ is going on!"

The room shook slightly, and before Gabriel knew it they were sitting out on an ivy-covered veranda, each with a cup of warm tea in their hands...which Gabriel immediately threw against the wall. "What the _hell_ did I just say!"

"Enough with the language," Balthazar said, taking a sip of his tea. "You're supposed to be my role model. The smart brother who took off to join a frat club in college."

"_Balthazar._" Gabriel said in a warning tone.

"Yes, yes," Balthazar nodded, placing his cup of tea down. He turned to face Gazardiel, who was currently shoving a crumpet into his mouth. He snapped, refilling the plate of crumpets. "You came to ask about Castiel," Balthazar said calmly, his eyes drifting toward Gabriel. "You're trying to save him?"

"Of course I-"

"Here." Balthazar pulled a small beige card from the inside of his jacket and handed it to his older brother, who took it eagerly. "This should do it."

"This is blank."

Balthazar laughed, "You think I would just hand you the solution?"

Gabriel frowned. "That was a joke?"

"Not really," Balthazar continued, taking another sip of his tea. "It will give you the solution to your problem, once your problem is gone."

"Gone?" Gazardiel and Gabriel both said this at the same time, then turned to face each other briefly.

"Well he's not going to _die_," Balthazar said with a roll of his eyes, nibbling on a bit of a crumpet. "He's just learning a lesson."

"I thought you said he was not going to get hurt?" Gazardiel insisted, "Was I misinformed?"

Balthazar looked between the two of them and sighed deeply, taking in a long breath. "A short while ago, Castiel and I were having a conversation out on this here veranda. Though, I must say it wasn't much of a conversation. You know him, he's weird. He stares a lot and does not say much. Anyway, this day was particularly gloomy for him, I could tell. I kept pressing for an answer, and finally he gave it to me. Do you know what he said?"

Gabriel clenched his jaw and smiled tentatively. He needed days of rest before he could deal with this - with his other brothers - again. "What did he say, _Balthazar_?" He prompted, the angel's name sounding almost like a slither.

"He said 'Dean.' That's it. Just, 'Dean.' Like that was a suitable enough answer!"

"Isn't it?"

"No! So I prompted even more and came to find that our dear Castiel has - believe it or not - trust issues! The poor angel thought he was neither cared about or loved."

"Did he not know I loved him?" Gazardiel asked.

"Not you, you featherbrain. Dean. _Dean,_ _Dean, Dean_, he would ramble on about all day and night!" Balthazar paused for a moment, taking a sip of some tea. "He felt like his feelings were one sided, and that Dean did not care for him as he obviously cared for Dean."

"Balthazar," Gabriel said in the calmest voice he could muster, though he felt as though it still appeared shrill and somewhat condescending. "Do you not know its best to _mind your own business?_"

Balthazar rolled his eyes and waved Gabriel's attitude off with a few flicks of his wrist. "I did the boy a favor."

"_How?_"

"You of all people should know, Gabriel," Balthazar said gently. "I got the idea from you."

"From..."

"Are you not the one who would teach us our lessons creatively? Allowing us to _truly_ see the problem, and the solution? I simply did the same thing for a brother in need."

"But he's going to die!" Gabriel shouted as he came to a stand. He turned to face Gazardiel. "I _know_ you made this spell. Fix it!"

"If I could fix this spell..." Gazardiel said quietly, his eyes narrowing. "Do you not think it would already be done?"

"I used his outline, but the rough draft is mine." Balthazar said with a soft smile as he too came to a stand, Gazardiel following suit. "Don't worry, Gabriel. Things will be resolved. This is just the beginning. Isn't that right, Gaz?"

Gazardiel said nothing, but instead reached out and placed his hand gently on Gabriel's forearm. Before Gabriel had the chance to pull away, the angel said softly, "Perhaps it would be best to leave your brother in the company of his caretakers for a short while? The Winchesters are pleasant people, I take it? Should they not know how to treat a child? Should Castiel not have the opportunity to learn, as we did, that there are others who care?"

Gabriel turned to look down at the small hand on his forearm, and when he looked up again, he was no longer on the veranda - nor was he in the apartment. Instead, he was standing beside the mountains where the angels had been trained to fly, many, many years ago. Near him, on one of the cliffs, stood two angels. He immediately recognized the smaller, younger one as Castiel. The elder one was himself.

_Castiel had been hovering, with his wings extended, over Gabriel. As Gabriel shouted words of encouragement, the young angel was nearing the ground, unable to keep himself up. "Brother, I'm tired! I cannot do this anymore!"_

_Gabriel reached out his arms to catch the young angel. "Alright! Come dow-"_

_Castiel's wings seemed to shiver, and in one swift movement he had fallen down on top of Gabriel, the elder angel collapsing onto the ground in a fit of laughter, crushed beneath Castiel's small frame. _

"_Gabriel!" Castiel shouted, hurrying to move off of his brother. "Gabriel! Can you move at all?" _

"_Move?" Gabriel asked with a deep laugh. "You're alive! If you want, I can fly!"_

_Castiel scrunched up his face then, mumbling something along the lines of "I'm not _that_ bad."_

Gabriel, who had appeared here, out of all memories, remained hidden and silent. These moments - these memories - they were his own lessons.


	7. Chapter Seven: Peppermint Nausea

_A brief "hello" to whoever is reading this! These are my ninth and tenth challenge words. This story is the __**seventh chapter**__ in an __**ongoing**__**story**__. By now you know what you should have read. WARNING, this story is now about to get rather sad. I hope you like it, and please know that this story was inspired by a story titled "Second Childhood," which is one of my favorite fanfics. Look it up when you have the time. It's a great story. Now, I'm done speaking so I will leave you to your reading. Enjoy._

_SPN Write-Off Day 11  
Challenge Category: "Sickness."  
Challenge Word: "Nausea."  
Character(s): Castiel, Dean, Sam  
Chapter Rating: K  
Genre: Angst, Comfort  
Setting: Sometime in Season 5._

**Peppermint Nausea**

Sam ran into Bobby's house with his arms extended, a bundle of sticky trench coat in his hands. His footsteps thundered throughout the house, almost as loud as the gaging sounds he was making. Dean, who had been napping in one of the chairs near the window, had woken up startled. His gun was out in a flash and positioned at the door, expecting trouble - but that was not the case.

A four year old Castiel stumbled into Bobby's house, his hair mused and his trench coat gone. He had one hand over his mouth and puffed out cheeks while the other hand was on his stomach. This, accompanied with the groans of pain, took a bit of time to register in Dean Winchester's mind. "Ohh," the man said, coming to a stand. "You're sick."

Castiel's bright blue eyes looked up at the man, his head tilting all the way up, and paused. He then looked back down and threw up on the floor.

"Okay, okay, here we go. I've got you," Dean said reassuringly, shrugging off his jacket and walking over to Castiel. He picked up the small child in his arms and walked over to the bathroom, where he could hear the sound of running water and Sam's girlish squeals.

"Dude, would you calm down?" Dean seethed, shooting Sam a look. Sam, who had tossed Castiel's trench coat into the hot water - filled tub, was hunched over the sink scrubbing furiously at his hands. "Its just a bit of throw up. You're making the kid nervous."

Dean placed Castiel down on the top of the toilet seat, and began to dab at the young boy's face with a damp cloth as Castiel continued to make noises. "Hang in there, kid," Dean said as he wiped at the boy's forehead. Bobby came in then, standing at the door way. "What's going on? And why is there throw up in my kitchen?"

"I think Cas is getting a bit nauseous with all the change. Jimmy's body is getting a bit weaker or something," Sam managed to say, his voice steadying. "We were on our way back and he just - he just got smaller - younger - then started throwing up and-"

"I'll get some ginger," Bobby said, turning to leave.

Castiel squirmed in Dean's grasp, and turned to face Bobby with a defiant cry. "Ahh! No! Eww!" was what he seemed to say, but his words were so jumbled it was hard to tell.

"You want to get cured, don't you?"

"Bobby, Bobby - its fine. I got it." Dean said, silencing Castiel. He pulled some peppermint candy out of one of his pockets and popped it into the child's mouth. "There. Don't swallow, ok? You'll be fine."

Bobby grumbled as he walked down toward the kitchen with a mop in his hand.

"I can't believe you just left him outside, to come in on his own." Dean said softly, placing the cold cloth on Castiel's neck and behind his ears.

"He threw up on me! What was I supposed to do?"

"Made sure he was okay. That's what I did with you."

Sam turned off the faucet, his hands red from all his scrubbing. He looked at Dean out of the corner of his eye before heading to the bathtub to pull Castiel's trench coat out of the mess. Upon second thought, he left it in the tub. "Its been two days since we last heard from Gabriel."

Castiel whimpered softly, and Dean turned to look at Sam with a sharp look. "Not now."

"But don't you think he should have been back by now?" Sam persisted.

"Dude, not now!"

Castiel's eyes began to well up, and he started sniffling as he sucked on the peppermint candy. Dean gathered the small boy into his arms again, making sure to be gentle, and walked him over to a spare room upstairs, away from Sam. Dean laid Castiel down on one of the beds, and began to wipe at Castiel's chest and arms with the cloth as he changed him. Dean made sure to look away from Castiel as he did so, which although it made it harder to put the young boy's pajamas on, felt more appropriate.

Within a half hour, the four year old Castiel was dressed in a pair of dinosaur footie pajamas and was tucked snuggly in his bed, his eyes closed and dreaming. His small hand was wrapped firmly around Dean's large one, and the more Dean tried to loosen the grip, the tighter it got. Dean eventually gave up struggling and settled down in a chair next to the boy, a glass of water in his other hand in case Castiel woke up and still felt a bit nauseous.

After sometime, Dean woke up to the feel of a small hand on his face. He realized then that he had fallen asleep with his head near Castiel, and that Castiel had woken up and began touching his face. "Dean?"

"Yeah?" Dean asked, his voice a bit rough upon waking. "What is it?"

"Can you sleep next to me?" The voice was small and unsure, and this time Dean could tell it was really Castiel asking, not Jimmy.

"Yeah, sure," Dean said, but as he pulled his hand away from Castiel's to untie his shoes, the small angel clung tighter.

"Dean-"

"I'm just going to take my shoes off, Sa- Cas. Its okay."

Castiel let go of Dean's hand unwillingly, and Dean undid his shoes and slipped into the bed with Castiel, the small angel immediately curling into the man's side, one of his arms slung over the man's chest to touch the mark on his shoulder. Dean looked down at the small hand on the large handprint, and sighed. "Cas, I-"

But his words went unheard, because the small angel had since fallen back asleep, his face buried in the man's chest. A few more hours had passed when Dean woke a second time, with a strong sense of fear - but after finding that he had Castiel clenched tightly against him, he was no longer afraid.

It was now that he saw night had come, which meant that the two had spent a half a day lying there, sleeping. Patterns and shadows fell along the ceiling, and Dean thought again of that night Castiel had visited him. The night Castiel had come and asked for help. He turned then to see that the small boy was peering up at him.

"How long have you been awake?" Dean asked, relaxing his arms.

Castiel just shrugged.

"Why didn't you wake me? Are you hungry?"

"No..." Castiel said with a shake of his head, his voice a bit rough and pained, reminding Dean again of that night.

"Oh." Dean was silent a moment, unsure of what to say. "Cas...Castiel, not Jimmy...you can hear me, can't you?"

It felt a bit silly, asking this question, but Dean was really unsure. The small angel just turned to look up at him, his eyes defiantly blue. "Yes, Dean."

Dean swallowed, rubbing his face with his free hand. "I just - Cas, I just want you to know... I'm sorry. I'm so sorry I can't help you. I wish there was something I could - some way I could... I wish this-" Dean paused and breathed in deeply. "I wish I could save you."

Castiel buried his face in Dean's side, and Dean felt tears seep into his shirt and press against his skin. "Cas..." Dean brought the small angel closer to him, if that was even possible, and held him tightly, hoping he would never have to let go.


	8. Chapter Eight: Heaven's Spite

_A brief "hello" to whoever is reading this! These are my ninth and tenth challenge words. This story is the __**eighth chapter**__ in an __**ongoing**__**story**__. By now you know what you should have read. WARNING, this story is now about to get rather sad. I hope you like it, and please know that this story was inspired by a story titled "Second Childhood," which is one of my favorite fanfics. Look it up when you have the time. It's a great story. Now, I'm done speaking so I will leave you to your reading. Enjoy._

_Character(s): Castiel, Gabriel  
Chapter Rating: K  
Genre: Angst, Comfort  
Setting: Sometime in Season 5._

**Heaven's Spite**

Who had ever thought it was possible for Heaven to be Hell? The thought had only crossed Gabriel's mind once, when Lucifer had fallen and Heaven had turned to chaos. Since then, he has had years and years to change his mind. He had seen the good and the bad of that world, just as he had seen the good and the bad of earth. But never in his life has he felt as much anguish as he had now.

"Stop!" He yelled at the darkening forest, the denseness and the cold as thick and real as on earth. "I get it, okay? Cut it out!"

The forest stayed silent, empty, and still. Gabriel had stopped running, stopped moving, and was now just standing, breathing heavily. The cold, moist air seeped into his lungs, reminding him of cold nights in Washington. "Please," he chocked, resting against the nearest tree, its sweat pressing into his clothes. A gentle rain had settled in his hair and in his eyes, blinding him momentarily. He tried to blink it away, and then rubbed at them furiously, hearing sounds of crashing waves and hushed voices nearby.

"Hello?" He shouted, stumbling, blindly, toward the sounds.

There was no answer, and still he rubbed at his eyes.

"Hello!"

"_Its not safe for you here! Not anymore. It is not safe for anyone."_

Gabriel stilled, dropping his arms. He knew that voice, and he knew this speech. The last thing he wanted was to see it again.

"_But, Brother, you-"_

"_If you stay here, I am no longer your brother."_

There was a silence then, and Gabriel's heart tensed. Why, out of all memories?

"_Gabriel...Father's coming back. Things are okay. There's no need for you to leave."_

"_Father is never coming home, Castiel! Get your head out of the clouds! You've got nothing here! I've got nothing here! This place is going to collapse! Michael's gone, Lucifer's gone, Father's gone... we've got no one."_

"_I thought I had you."_

"_Well, you were wrong."_

The words stung even more now than they did then, and Gabriel had wished more than anything that he had never spoken those words to Castiel. No wonder Castiel had stopped searching for him. No wonder he had taken the Winchesters side, so readily, over his own brother that night at the warehouse. He wasn't fit to call Castiel his brother, not after the way he had treated him. Not after all he had done.

Gabriel shouted loudly, frustrated he could not leave this nightmare. He was running out of time and out of ideas. All that he had left was -

Gabriel reached into his pocket and pulled out the blank card Balthazar had given him. He did not know what he had expected to see on it, but there was still nothing there. The card grew weak in the damp of the forest, and Gabriel brought it closer to his face, peering, hoping he would see something, anything - he had nothing left.

He was so distraught, he had not even realized he was crying - but when one of those tears fell down onto that blank card, a golden script appeared with a single address on it. Gabriel, at a loss of words, starred down at the golden script. He touched the scrawl with his fingertips, and suddenly, he was gone.


	9. Chapter Nine: Angel, Baby

_A brief "hello" to whoever is reading this! These are my ninth and tenth challenge words. This story is the __**ninth chapter**__ in an __**ongoing**__**story**__. This chapter is what originally started the "Until I'm Gone" chapters, so I hope that you like this. By now you know what you should have read. I hope you like it, and please know that this story was inspired by a story titled "Second Childhood," which is one of my favorite fanfics. Look it up when you have the time. It's a great story. Now, I'm done speaking so I will leave you to your reading. Enjoy._

_SPN Write-Off Day 4  
Challenge Word: "Babysit."  
Character(s): Castiel, Dean, Sam  
Chapter Rating: K  
Genre: Angst, Comfort  
Setting: Sometime in Season 5._

**Angel, Baby**

When Dean had woken up the next morning, it was to a harsh cry. He had fallen out of the bed him and Castiel had shared, and was standing, hair mused, looking for the source of the noise. It was then that Dean realized Castiel, in baby form, was a crier. A loud, obnoxious crier.

Sam, worried, had stormed into the room to find Dean staring at a lump of sheets and pajamas on the bed. "What is that noise?"

"Its Cas! He must have changed again while I was sleeping!" Dean shouted over the cries, flustered and frightened. "Sammy! Do something!"

"Gabriel is late! He should have been back by now. This shouldn't be our problem!" Sam shouted at his brother as he scooped up the crying Castiel to rock him in his arms, but the child just cried louder.

"You're not doing it right," Dean seethed.

"You were the one who babysat me, remember? What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"Sing to him!"

"Sing what?"

"Anything!"

Sam starred down at the crying bundle, cleared his throat, held the child higher in his arms, and began to sing._"Its just like heaven, being here with you..."_

"Oh, sweet piece of -"

"_You're like an angel-"_ Sam sang more loudly, rocking the baby harder in his arms to get Castiel to stop crying.

"Sam - " Dean stopped pacing, and looked up at his brother. He recognized that impatient look - he had seen it on Sam since they were kids. He looked over at Castiel, now as a child, and in Sam's arms. Dean calmed, his voice lowering. _"But after all, I love you, I do-"_

Sam's eyes darkened as he heard Dean, and he stopped singing.

"Sam." Dean said forcefully, placing a hand on his brother's arm. "Give him to me."

Sam's lips pressed together in a thin line, and he hesitated for a moment before he handed the crying, coughing baby over to Dean. "Fine, take him."

Dean took Castiel in his arms and put him against his shoulder. Walking slowly about the room, Dean started the song again, but softer. _"It's just like heaven, being here with you... You're like an angel, too good to be true." _

The baby's shrill cries turned into hiccups against Dean's gentle bouncing, and his fervent cries lessened into long, soft sobs against the hunter's plaid shirt. Dean moved to cradle the child in his arms. _"But after all, I love you, I do..."_

Castiel's sobbing stilled, and his blue eyes stared quizzically at Dean, who looked away as he continued to sing. _"Angel baby, my angel baby..." _He looked over at Sam, whose arms had crossed in front of him, his eyes fixated on Castiel.

Dean turned away from Sam, blocking his view of Castiel, and looked down again at the small child in his arms. After a quick glance into the baby's wide blue eyes, Dean turned away almost sheepishly, cleared his throat, and continued. _"When you are near me, my heart skips a beat. I can hardly stand on my own two feet..." _Dean felt his own heart grow heavy as Castiel's small hand grabbed at the hunter's jacket.

"_Because I love you,"_ Dean sang more softly and more gently, his eyes now turning to face the small child._ "I love you, I love you, I do."_

"Dean-" Sam whispered harshly, coming closer to loom over Dean's shoulder at the baby, who was now still and silent.

Dean did not hear his brother, as his thoughts were lost in those fading blue eyes in his arms. _"Angel baby, my angel baby..."_

_Those eyes... _Dean thought, _what if they never come back? "Oooh, I love you..."_

_What if there is no fix for this? "Ooh, I do..."_

Dean's grip on Castiel tightened, and the small angel's eyes watered._ "No one could love you, like I do..."_

"Dean-" Sam said, a bit more loudly.

"_Please never leave me, blue and alone..." _Dean's voice cracked gently, and he swallowed hard to rid the lump in his throat. _"If you ever go, I'm sure you'll come back home..."_

The baby's eyes closed tightly, tears welling on the edge of his eyelashes. _"Because I love you, I love you, I do..." _

Dean's grip tightened once more, as Castiel began to fade and disappear. "_Angel baby..." _Castiel's eyes tightened as he grew paler. _"...my angel baby..." _

_Please, Cas. "Oooh, I love you."_

_Come back... "Oooh, I do."_

Dean sobbed once as he saw all that was left in his arms was a bundle of sheets. His shoulders shook gently as he held the sheets against him. _"No one could love you...like I do."_


End file.
